Chapter 6: Fears-“My Weaknesses”

Fear Yourself to the Fullest!

From medicinal plants, flowers, colors and dreams, perhaps you’ve already noticed that they are all almost related with one another. So for now, here is something which is somehow related into dreams.

There were dreams which causes for someone to get inspired the following day. But we can never deny the fact that there are dreams that frightens us or the so called nightmares.

http://denisejanderson.blogspot.com/2010/07/cisphobia-just-another-phobia-that.html

Because of these things, we tend to become afraid seeing something which relates into our nightmares or may become a cause for having a phobia.

Scientifically, phobia which comes from the Greek word “phobos” which means fear, terror or panic is an irrational and exaggerated fear of an object/situation. Sometimes it may be a normal fear and the process of

 Being afraid or terrified into something serves as a protection through alerting a person to real dangers or threats that must be avoided or confronted. Basically frequent, severe and intense anxiety is its causes.

Other books say that phobia is an abnormal fear of an object, act or situation wherein the person having a phobia may be aware that his fear is unrealistic but he can’t control it. Whenever he tries to confront his feared object/situation, he tends to feel extreme agity or he may even collapse. 

According to the psychiatrists and psychologists, the feared objects/situations is a symbol for an unconscious fear in which the person holds back because for them, it is too hard to face or accept it. Like for example, frightening experiences causes trauma.

Some of those phobias are claustrophobia, the fear of closed places like elevator, a room without a window, etc.; nyctophobia, the fear of darkness; acrophobia, fear of heights wherein it includes the fear of success or reaching the top; necrophobia, fear of death or dead bodies; agoraphobia fear of open spaces; zoophobia, fear of animals; gatophobia, fear of cats and many more phobias.

Why is it so?

There are identified things or how and why a person attained such phobia.

Some of the mental health professionals thought that phobias and other neurotic symptoms were result of repressed and unconscious conflicts. According to them, phobias are effects of mixed psychological and biological factors, extensions of normal fears which are attained during childhood or adolescence.

A person who is nervous by nature can be developed into having a phobia. It may be observed from childhood and so inherited through generations. Once the phobia has been developed, it could maintain itself and eventually it will be too hard for the person to realize that there is no real danger exists.

But as for me, once the person has a phobia or has been feared of something which lasts for almost years already, it is really hard for him to relieve it. The things you’ve been used to do are almost irreplaceable.

This is me!

I myself tend to shiver whenever I see or remember things I am afraid of. These are frightful things I see in horror movies, flying insects and frog. “Matatakutin at magugulatin akong tao” which are maybe due of my being a serious type of person. I often accept jokes but most of the time, I prefer to hate it whenever someone is already being embarrassed be it in front or not in public.

I don’t know why but I am afraid of being in front of the public. I seldom make a habit of trying because I am afraid to fall, loss or be rejected. They say that before you quit make a try. But how can someone do that when every time he attempts to, there’s always that something that hinders. Probably because despite of all the good things you’ve done, only a few appreciates and understands the real reason behind it.

http://gregorycrofford.wordpress.com/2011/05/23/when-you-think-youre-alone-psalm-121/

 As much as possible, I want always to have a companion for I am afraid of being alone because I have been in the situations where I’ve got into danger and that I was all alone. Thanks to God I was able to surpass them and went back home alive.

I am afraid of making a try because there were instances before wherein I did, but I failed. That’s why I am afraid to fail for the next time around like for example, falling in love. I’ve lost my first and so far my last relationship. I was deceived despite of the love and trust I gave. I easily give my trust and believe what others have said but that was before, now, maybe not anymore. I’ve learned from my past so pardon me for those whom I have doubted. “Hindi nyo naman siguro ako masisisi kung bakit hirap na akong magtiwala at maniwala sa iba.” There’s a saying that “trust is like an eraser, it gets smaller after every mistake.”

I am afraid of taking obligations because I might not work them out. I am afraid to spend because I might get in-need in the near future. I am afraid to hope and wait just for nothing.

But of all the things I am afraid of, the deepest of all is losing my family. Who would ever wish to lose their family? Of course there’ll be none because everyone needs a family and that I am afraid to lose mine without giving them in return all the things they have given me and without letting them experience a bountiful living. I am afraid to die having done nothing for them and for myself yet.

But here is a quote which says something about the reality of fear.

“You’re not scared of the dark, you’re scared of what’s in it;

 You’re not afraid of heights, but of falling;

 You’re not afraid of people around you but of rejection;

 You’re not afraid of love but of not being loved back;

 You’re not afraid to try again but of getting hurt for the same reason.”

Somehow, the person who made it has a point in saying so but the big deal here is that, how could someone face his fears when he fears fear itself.

God’s Love in Mysterious Ways

A person with phobia tends not to leave their house anymore just to skip from encountering those things they’re afraid of. They are afraid to leave safe place like home or safe person that’s why these people frequently remain household for years. These people have agoraphobia.

What about those who tends to blush, tremble and unable to behave naturally in public? They are afraid of public speaking, eating in public, parties, social gatherings or business conferences. It usually begins in the late adolescence or early adulthood—the social phobia.

Furthermore, there are people who fears specific objects/situations such as transportations which include crossing bridges or riding an airplane; dogs/cats, thunderstorms, heights, darkness, etc. This fear tends to lessen the heart rate, blood pressure and makes the phobic person get fainted.

However, have you ever thought what would happen to those people who are extremely frightful into something? Well as I could visualize it, their lives can be ruined if they wouldn’t be able to confront their fears. It is because no matter how often they skip on to those things, there would always come a point of encountering them unintentionally.

http://www.emotionalcompetency.com/helpless.htm

According to the book I have read, the person who is under great fear of something tends to lessen or decrease his judgement and thinking ability. His behaviour becomes more inconsistent; may take actions that might bring him closer into danger and may trash out in hysterical agitation (according to Austin F. Grigg of University of Richmond in the Encyclopedia Americana). In short, the person becomes helpless.

Those are the somehow pathetic things being encountered by a person who has a great phobia. It also shows how those people live miserably just because of those things they fear of.

These made me realized how thankful I should be having not experienced all those helpless things. Yes, I tend to tremble whenever there is frog in front of me but not to extent of collapsing. So from now on, I’ll try to overcome my fears because I get inspired into this text message which says that “life holds no promises to what will come our way. It just gives us time to make choices and to take chances.” How inspiring right? Why waste time fearing things that are yet to happen where we can enjoy the good things we have now.

Changing is difficult but with the heart that is determined, nothing is impossible. I know nobody has the power to make things perfect but somehow I guess, everyone is given a chance to make things right. But then again, don’t expect life to be wonderful because everything would be nothing if God is missing.

So, “trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths”—Proverbs 3:5-6.

REFERENCES

• Encyclopedia Americana (F)
• Encyclopedia Americana (P)
• New Standard Encyclopedia (P)